{"id":3462,"date":"2010-05-14T23:54:26","date_gmt":"2010-05-14T20:54:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/talentirosit.ro\/?p=3462"},"modified":"2012-12-14T22:21:59","modified_gmt":"2012-12-14T22:21:59","slug":"afumatii-de-la-crasma","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/juverdeanu.ro\/blog\/afumatii-de-la-crasma","title":{"rendered":"Afuma\u0163ii de la cr\u00e2\u015fm\u0103"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>N-ai cu cine.. ni\u015fte droga\u0163i.<\/p>\n<p>Cel mai frumos este atunci c\u00e2nd se adun\u0103 vreo 5 amici la o cr\u00e2\u015fm\u0103 s\u0103 discute probleme existen\u0163iale \u00eent\u00e2lnite pe parcursul unei s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2ni. \u015ei nu zic frumos la modul cel r\u0103u, dar urmeaz\u0103 s\u0103-mi bat joc de afum\u0103toare. Adic\u0103 s\u0103 exagerez pe nesim\u0163ite.<!--more--><\/p>\n<p>Afum\u0103toarele sunt acele c\u0103m\u0103ru\u0163e construite din lemn deasupra unei gropi, \u00een care se face focul, pentru a se afuma carnea de porc. \u015ei domnule, \u015funca e mai bun\u0103 c\u00e2nd e afumat\u0103 pentru c\u0103 are un gust aparte, dar c\u00e2nd e vorba de o asem\u0103nare cu personajele mirifice de la \u00eent\u00e2lnire, atunci exist\u0103 o problema. Major\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>O parte dintre cei prezen\u0163i (unul subsemnat), nu prea suportul fumul de \u0163igaret\u0103 \u00een mas\u0103. Adic\u0103 atunci c\u00e2nd vreo 6 personaje se pun pe supt \u0163igarete \u015fi suflat \u00een sus \u015fi-n jos cu fum, doar ca s\u0103-l \u00eemp\u0103r\u015ftie \u00een jur \u015fi s\u0103 se laude c\u0103-s \u00een stare s\u0103 carbonizeze o pizza numai cu respira\u0163ia. Domnule \u015fi put, \u015fi au din\u0163ii galbeni \u015fi le l\u0103crimeaz\u0103 ochii de la at\u00e2ta fum, dar tot nu se opresc. Unul dintre ei se bate cu pumnul \u00een piept ca s\u0103 nu tu\u015feasc\u0103 \u015fi mainscoate o \u0163igaret\u0103 pe care o aprinde cu tact, c\u0103 mai poate s\u0103-\u015fi mai afume apropia\u0163ii \u00eenainte s\u0103 fac\u0103 tuberculoz\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>\u015ei femeile fumeaz\u0103. Da, fumeaz\u0103 KENT OPT, c\u0103 e fumul mai dulce. Sau poate ele cred c\u0103 fumul \u00eenseamn\u0103 aer de intelectual. Adic\u0103, p\u00e2n\u0103 la urm\u0103, to\u0163i arti\u015ftii au c\u00e2teun viciu sau c\u00e2teo surs\u0103 de inspira\u0163ie. Unii se mul\u0163umeau cu alcool, al\u0163ii sper\u0103 s\u0103 le cad\u0103 fisa cu rumegu\u015f \u015fi h\u00e2rtie. C\u0103-s bune tu.<\/p>\n<p>Dar e pl\u0103cerea lor, a femeilor, s\u0103 fumeze \u015fi s\u0103 r\u00e2njeasc\u0103 atunci c\u00e2nd mai scot c\u00e2teun fum pe bucur\u0103. Dar atunci c\u00e2nd expir\u0103 se ascund, c\u0103 de fapt le vine s\u0103 mai \u015fi scuipe c\u0103 au flegm\u0103 \u00een g\u00e2t. Dar nu. Nu scuip\u0103 ci \u00ee\u015fi comand\u0103 o \u0163igaret\u0103 nou\u0103 \u015fi \u00eenghite. S\u0103 arate la lume c\u0103-s rezistente la KENT 8: &#8222;\u0162tig\u0103rile feminit\u0103\u0163ii&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p>\u00cen dou\u0103 ore, cr\u00e2\u015fma toat\u0103 se umple de fum de la aceste surse inepuizabile de CODOI. &#8222;Adic\u0103 s\u0103 nu mai fumez? Doamne fere\u015fte, prefer s\u0103 m\u0103 sp\u00e2nzur.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>\u015ei a disp\u0103rut \u015fi respectul. \u015eti\u0163i voi, \u0103la cu: &#8222;Te deranjeaz\u0103 dac\u0103 fumez?&#8221; iar eu politicos, s\u0103 zic: &#8222;Nu&#8221; \u00een speran\u0163a c\u0103 fumeaz\u0103 doar una. Aiurea. Cinci pachete de \u0163ig\u0103ri \u00een dou\u0103 ore. ASta ca s\u0103 regret acel &#8222;Nu&#8221; spus \u00een urm\u0103 cu c\u00eeteva luni \u015fi s\u0103 fiu sigur c\u0103 \u00een fiecare s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103 m\u0103 pot \u00eentoarce acas\u0103, pot s\u0103 m\u0103 dezbrac, s\u0103 iau o bucat\u0103 de \u015func\u0103 din frigider, s-o-nvelesc \u00een \u0163oale, iar a doua zi s-o pun de-o afum\u0103tur\u0103 pe cinste.<\/p>\n<p>C\u0103 put. Put hainele, pute telefonul, pute ghiozdanul, pute agenda, pute buletinul. Toate put de la \u0163igara \u0103lora care prefer\u0103 s\u0103 fumeze pe nesim\u0163ite o sut\u0103 de \u0163ig\u0103ri \u00een preajma nefum\u0103torilor \u015fi care nici m\u0103car nu au bunul sim\u0163 de a-\u015fi controla viciul \u0103sta.\u00a0 S\u0103 ia naibii o gum\u0103 cu nicotin\u0103, s\u0103 mearg\u0103 afar\u0103, s\u0103-\u015fi cumpere acadele sau s\u0103 str\u00e2ng\u0103 limba-ntre din\u0163i dou\u0103 ore f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103-\u015fi inunde pl\u0103m\u00e2nii cu FUM!<\/p>\n<p>Cam at\u00e2t. \u00cen rest mi-a f\u0103cut pl\u0103cere \u015fi ne mai vedem c\u00e2nd v\u0103 num\u0103ra\u0163i singuri \u0163igaretele &#8211;\u00a0Voi, afum\u0103toarelor (masculin \u015fi feminin).<\/p>\n<p>PS: Da, e scris\u00a0ca s\u0103\u00a0v\u0103 iau la\u00a0mi\u015fto\u00a0 \ud83d\ude00<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>N-ai cu cine.. ni\u015fte droga\u0163i. Cel mai frumos este atunci c\u00e2nd se adun\u0103 vreo 5 amici la o cr\u00e2\u015fm\u0103 s\u0103 discute probleme existen\u0163iale \u00eent\u00e2lnite pe parcursul unei s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2ni. \u015ei nu zic frumos la modul cel r\u0103u, dar urmeaz\u0103 s\u0103-mi bat joc de afum\u0103toare. Adic\u0103 s\u0103 exagerez pe nesim\u0163ite.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[272],"tags":[276],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v17.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Afuma\u0163ii de la cr\u00e2\u015fm\u0103 - Cristi Juverdeanu<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/juverdeanu.ro\/blog\/afumatii-de-la-crasma\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"ro_RO\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Afuma\u0163ii de la cr\u00e2\u015fm\u0103 - Cristi Juverdeanu\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"N-ai cu cine.. ni\u015fte droga\u0163i. Cel mai frumos este atunci c\u00e2nd se adun\u0103 vreo 5 amici la o cr\u00e2\u015fm\u0103 s\u0103 discute probleme existen\u0163iale \u00eent\u00e2lnite pe parcursul unei s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2ni. \u015ei nu zic frumos la modul cel r\u0103u, dar urmeaz\u0103 s\u0103-mi bat joc de afum\u0103toare. 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